“Nannette, do you know any four-year-olds?” – Step 5 The Gift of Perspective

We turn to addictive substances and behaviors instead of turning to God, and one of the reasons we do is because we don’t think God likes us very much. Many of us start feeling bad about ourselves when we are very little, at least I did, and it doesn’t take much. I’ll never forget sitting across from my sponsor, opening up my notebook and beginning to read. “Age two,” I started, “I resented the little boys who pushed my tricycle into the gutter full of water on irrigation day and who rubbed grapes in my hair.” “Age four” I continued with trepidation “I regret going into a shed with some little boys who wanted to have a two second peek at my “backside” and then lying to my dad about it. There, I’d said it! So embarrassing!

My sponsor’s response – “Nannette, do you know any four year olds?” Four year olds? My thirty-eight year old mind scanned through all the little people I knew and loved. Tears came to my eyes. In an instant, I came to grips with the fact that this moment of immodesty, the moment that was the beginning of all future certainty that God was disappointed in me occurred when I was only four years into earth life. New perspective is one of God’s great gifts as we take Step 5, the confession step. Do you know any four-year-olds?

By Nannette W. Posted Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Copyright 2011 by Nannette W. All right reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit. This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

Spinning Goals into Gifts, Heavens Great Transformation

Today I would like to share that much of what I desire in this life is surprisingly coming to me as a gift from God rather than a goal for God.

In the book “Alcoholics Anonymous” page 8 one of the founders, Bill W. shares, “I was to know happiness, peace, and usefulness in a way that is incredibly more wonderful as time passes.”

Happiness, peace, and usefulness, in great abundance, are certainly what I have always wanted and thought I was working toward. The paradoxical thing about my life today is that happiness, peace, and usefulness are no longer the focus of my desires, but they have become the byproduct applying each of the gospel centered 12 Steps and using all the tools the Lord has given me to live in daily, hourly, moment by moment connection with Him. The other day, I simply had to pause in the middle of an activity and acknowledge the peace I was feeling. I hadn’t been “working” on peace. I hadn’t set a new goal to be more at peace, but there I was feeling it. It was given to me. It was a very tangible thing like being cold or hot or tired or rested or full or hungry. I was in peace, a fact I never could have manufactured. I do desire even greater happiness, peace, and usefulness. Who doesn’t! However today I know that this cannot be my focus. In fact when I make these things my aim I begin to feel crazy inside. My experience is this - First I must come unto Christ in all the ways I know how and seek to know what He wants me to do next, then I must seek His power to do what I think He wants me to do, and finally I must take action believing that He is helping me. I am nowhere near perfect or even proficient at living this way, but when I do the happiness, peace and usefulness I obsessed over for so many years come – as gifts received from God rather than goals achieved for God.

By Nannette W.

Posted Friday, August 12, 2011

Copyright 2011 by Nannette W. All right reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit. This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

Self-Knowledge is Overrated

Today I would like to share on the words from the book Alcoholics Anonymous, “Self-knowledge availed us nothing.”

There has been much scientific advancement in the study of addiction. I must admit that it does bring a certain relief to know that those of us who struggle with addictive substances and behaviors have developed scientifically measurable signs of illness of both mind and body, that our ability to make good choices has actually become physiologically weak. However, knowing about me does not fix me. Self-knowledge is not the cure. The best self-knowledge can do is motivate me to seek the cure. It’s no different than any other illness in that naming it, describing it scientifically, and even finding its root cause will never have the power to heal it. I find it very important to remember that I can never replace understanding my disease, though interesting and perhaps motivating, with the real work of overcoming my disease.

By Nannette W.

Posted Thursday, August 11, 2011

Copyright 2011 by Nannette W. All right reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit. This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.

Fellowship with a Capital "F"

Today I would like to share about Fellowship, "Association between individuals especially on pleasant or intimate terms. Synonyms: company, companionship, society" (see Merriam-Webster Dictionary)

Fellowship in recovery is critical. Giving individual support, receiving personal support, attending meetings, reaching out on the telephone, giving service, and seeking ecclesiastical and family support; these are all effective ways of building a foundation of fellowship as we strive to abstain from the harmful substances and behaviors that threaten us. Every one of these avenues for fellowship is part of my everyday life in recovery. However, I have found another source of fellowship that is unlike any of the things I just listed. This fellowship is different because I can enjoy it any time, night or day. I can experience it in a crowd or in the quiet of my own solitary company, in my pajamas, my jeans, or my Sunday best, in my car or lying on my pillow. It is fellowship with the Lord through His Holy Spirit. In every recovery meeting I have ever attended one or more participants mention that they come to the meeting to feel the Spirit. I hope they understand that the Spirit they feel is not limited to the meeting they are sitting in, that the same Spirit they are feeling in the rooms of recovery can leave with them, strengthen them against temptation, and give them the comfort they seek all day and all night long. This is Fellowship with a capital “F.”

By Nannette W.

Posted Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Copyright 2011 by Nannette W. All right reserved. Making or sending copies is permitted if the page is not changed in any way and the material is not used for profit. This notice must be included on each copy made or sent.