“What Was I Thinking?” – Step 10

In the 5th grade I was given the honorable responsibility of being an official “Bathroom Monitor.” Another girl in my class, Cathy, and I were in charge of “making” all the other girls in the school take good care of the bathroom during lunch. After the school bell rang, indicating that lunch was over and it was time for everyone to return to class, Cathy and I got to stay in the bathroom and make sure that everything was nice and tidy. It was quite the “groovy thing” to have a responsibility that allowed you to walk into class late, with permission.

One day after the bell rang and the bathroom cleared we tidied things up and were about to return to class when my friend said, “Nannette, do you want to see something really cool.” She proceeded to show me how fun it was to make wet wadded up paper towels and throw them at the ceiling of the bathroom. They stuck every time! I must have agreed that it was really fun because for the next few minutes we wadded up paper towels, one after the other, and tossed them at the ceiling and laughed and laughed. Finally we both determined that it was time to return from our honorable position, to class.

When we entered the room the class was involved in something quiet. I don’t remember what. I only remember the silence as the principle of the school cracked the door open just wide enough to beckon my friend Cathy to join her in the hall. Not a minute went by before the door to the silent room opened again and the principle’s eyes fell on me. As her index finger swung back and forth I arose out of my seat and headed for the door. The next few minutes were the first and last I ever spent in her office. She asked us what on earth we might have been thinking. She reminded us of our responsibility as the older children in the school. She told us that if anything like this ever happened again she would be forced to call each of our parents. I don’t remember if we still got to be the “Bathroom Monitors.” I do remember that she had us go get the long wooden poll that was usually used to open and close the little skinny windows, or transoms, in our classrooms. These windows ran all along one wall, way up high next to the ceiling. On the end of the poll was a hook, just perfect for reaching up and knocking down the now dry paper towels staring down on us from the bathroom ceiling.

What an afternoon. I only recently told my mother. We had a good laugh. Whenever I do something and the wrongness of my actions takes me by complete surprise I think of this little experience. I don’t know where my head was, but I had absolutely no feeling of guilt. It just didn’t seem like any kind of a problem while I was “wadding, wetting, and throwing!” Where was my conscience? I don’t know!

I do know that this was not the last time I unknowingly committed a wrong. At the end of each day I review my actions in the spirit of Step 10, which says to, “Continue to take personal inventory, and when you are wrong promptly admit it.” If I do so with humility and the desire to be thorough, sometimes I can almost see the door of another classroom open and I catch the loving eye of the Lord. With no coercion, only an invitation, He bids me to allow Him to help me recognize, admit, and make amends for misdeeds I would have completely missed if left to myself. I testify that He is the Savior for all of those, “What was I thinking?” moments in life!

By Nannette W.
Posted Thursday, November 6, 2008

Copyright 2008 by Nannette W. All right reserved.
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